Guilty Pleasures

I have a problem with guilt. I am always feeling guilty about something. I feel guilty when I can't figure out a way to see all my friends and extended family who come in town for football weekends. I feel guilty when I have to tell my husband that I cannot go to dinner and a movie with him Friday night because I know that I will have to work late. I feel guilty when I leave my parents house, especially when I know I won't be back for a few months. I feel guilty when one of my students wants to switch their hours, but it doesn't work with the schedule. I feel guilty when my little sister asks if there are any available parking spots left for the tailgate and the answer is no or when a friend wants to crash at our place for the weekend, but all the beds are full. I feel guilty when I see someone pushing through their early morning run after I pushed the snooze button 3 times. I feel guilty when I have to RSVP "no" to an event. I feel guilty when my husband wants to go to Pittsburgh for a long weekend, but I cannot afford to take anymore time off from work. I feel guilty when I spend too much money at J. Crew or any other store for that matter. I feel guilty when I warm up leftovers for dinner instead of cooking a real meal. I feel guilty when I have to tell an interviewee that they did not get the job. I feel guilty when my adorable little niece asks me in her I am the cutest kid in the world, you cannot say no to me voice "Aunt Laura, when are you and Uncle Adam going to live closer to my house?"

See, I have a serious problem with guilt.


The list goes on and on and my husband constantly tells me that I have to just stop allowing myself to feel guilty (as if it's that simple) because I cannot control all these things. Even as I type this I can hear him saying "you cannot always make everyone happy" or "there will be other birthday parties" which usually makes me say something like "but Jack and Sophia will only turn 1 once!" 

I don't know if I will really ever be able to conquer all my guilty feelings although I do think I have improved as of recently, but I do know that there is one thing I will never feel guilty about: homemade double chocolate chip cookies. Life's way too short not to enjoy these guilty little pleasures and they can be a great comfort when that ugly, pain in the side friend "guilt" stops by for yet another visit.

Double Chocolate Chip Cookies (adapted from Williams-Sonoma) 

Start by getting all of your ingredients together. You will need unsweetened chocolate, flour, brown sugar, white sugar, salt, baking powder, butter, shortening, one egg, vanilla, and chocolate chips. You will also need at least two mixing bowls and cookie sheets, a cutting board, a sharp knife, mixing utensils (wooden spoon and rubber spatula), a double boiler if you have one, otherwise a simple bowl will work.  

1. Chop 1 ounce of unsweetened chocolate. 

2. Melt chocolate and set aside.

3. Mix together a total of 8 tablespoons of fat from the butter and shortening. Depending on your preferences, you can do a ration of 7:1, 6.5:1.5, 6:2 or any other combination. I personally would not use more shortening than butter, but this is an opportunity to try different combinations to discover which way you most prefer the texture of your cookies (don't be afraid to experiment!). Also add in 2/3 cup of brown sugar and 1/4 cup of granulated sugar. Mix all together.

4. Add in the 1 ounce on melted chocolate.

5. Mix in one egg at room temperature and 1 1/4 teaspoons of vanilla. 

6. Slowly, add in a cup of flour, a quarter teaspoon of salt, and 1 1/2 teaspoons of baking powder. Mix only until combined.

7. Finally, add in at least one cup of chocolate chips. You can add more if desired or you can add in a mixture of semi-sweet and dark chocolate chips. 

8. Scoop 12 spoonful of dough onto the cookie sheets. Bake at 350 degree for 15 minutes. Do not over cook. Since these are chocolate cookies, it will be a bit more difficult to tell if they are browning. They should not require more than 15 minutes.

 9. Once cooked, remove from cookie sheet with a metal spatula and allow to cool.

There are plenty of things in life that we will all inevitably feel guilty about whether or not we actually should feel guilty. Don't feel guilty when you have one of these. Just enjoy! Life's just too short not to. And if nothing else, you can bring them to the next birthday party!